once upon a delusion

once upon a time, i was innocently chilling at a bus stop

this guy approaches innocent, sweet little me

but i don't often talk to strangers.

and because of my neurotic mother and over-protective father, 

what has been engraved in my mind and thus was 

replaying in my mind, was similar to this: 

'holy crap, holy crap. he's gonna rape me, 

he's gonna sell me to the black market. 

but i like my vital organs. and 

i'm bad with customer services. dammit 

i don't wanna work in a sweatshop.' 

REALITY:

guy: what time is it?

me: time to get a watch--

me: (notices he is wearing a watch AND owns a phone)

me: three forty-five

guy: yeah, so my friend likes you.

WHUT.

guy: he wants to get to know you.

me: yeah, get to know my fist

  so that got me thinkin'. 

i found the best way to turn a guy done nicely. 

  other guy: so... will you be my girlfriend? 

me: sorry, i'm lesbian.

  IT WORKS! IT WORKS, I TELL YOU! 

forget the wierd stares or disapproving shake of heads, but it works.

 damn. there goes my reputation. what reputation?

anyway, that got me thinking even more.

i was wearing no make up.

wait, what. what is this?! 

WHAT IS THIS, I ASK YOU?!

am i just not doing it right when it comes to make up?!

am i doing it wrong?! am i?

whaaat you're not supposed fill the eyeshadow to your eyebrows 

and put on the reddest red lipstick on? 

what? or was that guy just soo deprived of women, he thought

'shit man, this will do.'

....

ugh. dayum gotta get my game up.

what you talkin about?

lolwhut you have no game. go home, you

i just found that moment in life amusing.

and so, in conclusion:

i will never go to the bus stop ever again.

and she lived happily ever after.

Stay ugly,

♥ Lynette Joy.